Desperate measures

You've heard of scream therapy? This morning was hard. If you've been reading these posts you may remember the camera troubles, no battery charger, lots of searching and driving till one was found. This morning the battery was dead, again. I found the new charger dangling under the desk where Rachel left it. Rachel is 34 and has no trouble leaning down to do things under the desk. I'm 67 and happy to be upright and mobile. Under the desk is not feasible. So, I took myself in hand and squatted down to see if I could thread the cord up through the proper hole in the back of the desk so it would be on the desk, and not under the desk. I threaded the cord up, congratulating myself, but I couldn't make it stay there. I threw the toilet paper at it, hoping to pin it in place. (The toilet paper is here in lieu of kleenex.) I stretched, I moaned. When I reached with my right hand to secure it, my left hand pulled it back down. I reviewed who was in the house. No one. No children who would be frightened, no employees who would be mortified. I screamed loud and long. I felt better. The cord is under the desk, but I don't care as much.

I can get away with gluten free toast and almond butter once in a while without too much trouble. But three times in two days, no way. Too much simple carbohydrate, not enough protein. During a celiac flare I tend to seek the easiest, highest sugar food around that seems even remotely sensible. By ten this morning I was one or two notches up from cranky, felt like I had the flu, and was in more pain than I could ignore. My kind and wise daughter talked me through it and reminded me that I need real food and less pressure.

I cancelled the meeting scheduled for this afternoon and faced the tasks here at home. Two weeks of company and I've forgotten what normal is. I'm pretty sure if I do the dishes, sweep and wash the floors and clean out the frig, I will remember. It's all in there somewhere. (In my head.) I know how to do this, it's just misplaced. Then I'll cook some fish and greens and get back on track.

When I realized it would be hours till that happened, I went for the emergency rations. Tuna (from Trader Joe's because it has no additives) in oil, because I like it (and I use less mayo), a whole ripe tomato, a few chopped slices of red onion, and mayo. I had a cup of green tea because my nice naturopath told me it would help and it does. (No side effects I can tell.) I will feel better soon, I bet.

I'm writing all this because it's my life and lots of people with celiac disease face similar circumstances. I'm hoping it will be an encouragement, and maybe you'll smile to think of me screaming at the camera cord. Life is hard for everyone and we have this particular burden to bear. Bear up, find something to laugh at, and do your best. Eat something good for dinner. (And by that I don't mean tasty, I mean good for you.)